Deal Breakers

So last night Rachel and I made a list of Deal breakers. As in, if we were seeing someone and they did one of these things, it would automatically end the relationship.

1. Conservatives (duh)
2. Referring to a vagina as a "snatch" "cootchie" "cunt." Any ridiculous nickname, really.
3. Having any of their favorite bands be Nickleback, Creed, Staind, Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park...
4. Not having at least some respect or appreciation for Buffy. Or any Joss Whedon show.
5. Telling me what to do with my hair
6. Smokers
7. Heavy drinkers
8. Not having a job or being in school
9. Using racial slurs casually
10. Goes to the Ra shop frequently
11. Burns incense
12. Doesn't read
13. Neat freaks
14. Drives a big truck...or SUV....or hummer...
15. Considers the Time Warp a thrift store
16. Texts more than they call

I'm sure I'll add more later...

"And I never felt so wicked / as when I willed our love to die"

I have been listening to Rilo Kiley's "Under the Blacklight" on repeat.

Such a good break-up album. It has entered my life at the perfect time.

I'm handling things I haven't handled in years... or never. It's all very strange to me, but it's not all bad. I feel like I have so much to learn, I'm so fucking behind.

I'm growing up so fast in such little time and I'm getting long oddly-shaped stretch marks.

My growth's been stunted, but it's all coming all at once RIGHT NOW and I'm getting taller and taller and taller.

I want to keep growing. I want to reach tree tops, I don't want it to stop.

I can't be bound anymore.

I need to put off my tattoo for now. I'm not quite ready to get what I want. If I get it now, it won't mean what I want it to mean. And that's very important to me.

I'm figuring out things about me that I've ignored for so long. Not many people know yet. But they will eventually. But first I need to figure out what the hell is going on. I don't necessarily want to define myself, it's impossible. Everyone wants to view things in black and white but that's fucking impossible. Life is a big, long, colorful spectrum. Sexuality, gender, human emotion, it's all a spectrum.

And I'm so fucking small and drunk as hell and I understand so much, and believe me, it's more than I ever wanted to.

"I was your silver lining, but now I'm gold"

I'm drunk
I'm lonely
I miss him
I'm tired of this shit

Is your faith your own?

I just listened to a song my Daddy wrote.
It made me cry.
I know my Dad's been playing music a long time, but I've always been afraid to listen to any of it. I was so afraid I'd be embarrassed of my Dad, of his music, of his voice. I didn't want to be ashamed of him. But I listened to a song he just wrote, and it was beautiful.
I'm so proud of my Daddy.

Faith by Chris Moore

If you want to be free, be free

It's over.

I've never felt so alive in my entire life.

I'm getting ready for a journey :)